Thursday, February 17, 2011


The day my dad passed away, I was left with the realisation that the one person who had loved me most had left me for good. As I cleared his things, I’d find little trinkets of notes and gifts I had given him, tucked somewhere in the mass amount of files and diaries dating back to his days as a politician. I had just been born then and it would seem I had inherited his hoarding habit.

I braved myself as I realised here was a man who had never told me how much he loved me just like most Indian dads holding on to homemade gifts from a twelve year old kid. And I was the kid who had to learn how to hug and say I love you to friends only after he passed on.

Not a day goes by without me wishing he was still around. I finally stopped wishing that I would hear the impatient horn of his car so that one of us will open the doors for him. Not a day went by without us fighting over same trivial thing because we were probably the world’s most stubborn people. Unless for that one last year. But I’d be in denial if I told you; life wasn’t easier in some ways without him.

For one, I wouldn’t be who I am if he hadn’t gone. The bravery, confidence, independent streak would not have been possible if he had been around to look after me. Dad used to take care of nearly everything for us; I had never even renewed my car road tax by myself. Somehow I think he knew his time was up as weeks before, he handed me the details and chased my to the post office to get them renewed.

Today I change tires, terrorise irritating bankers, tell of people (who deserved to be), run my finances and all legal requirements and even travel the globe alone. If dad had been around, world war 3 would have taken place on the mere mention of travelling without him!  

Without him, I’d become self reliant. Without him, I was free to explore so many possibilities.
Without him, I had no hero to look after me.

A lost is a lost no matter how many years pass. I would trade all these to be able to fight with my dad again. At least I’d hear his voice again right?

The last 7 years haven’t been easy. You can wait in line with the rest of us (billions or so people) in wishing life was easy. When I look back at every single happiness, betrayal and sadness, I know there’s nothing I regret, nothing I want to change or nothing I wish I could change except for my dad’s loss.

What I do know is, he’s always around looking out for me. He knows just what to send over my way whenever I need help. It’s just his method is a bit quirky. I’d see trouble blinding me from miles away before I finally realise the message behind everything.

Dad got back into his protective saddle a few days shy of his 64th birthday slamming and closing doors all around me. It wasn’t until today, that I realised he had set all the plans up for the clock to move in motion. Yesterday dad turned 65.

Today I finally cried for the father I lost 7 years ago.

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Friday, February 04, 2011

The hamsap bunny

Gong xi fa chai

They say the new year day would determine the events for the rest of the year. If that was the case, the year of the bunny is gonna be one horny fella!

Weirdness and me have much in common but this was just way out of the ordinary. Determined not to sleep my long holiday away, I ventured out to seek sources of inspiration to shoot and arrived smack at the centre of Kuala Lumpur.

The streets were filled with foreign workers obviously enjoying their long weekend with gust and vigour. That’s when i spotted the old man dressed in the usual apek fashion of old shirt and shorts sitting atop a motorbike parked in front of a seemingly empty looking shop lot. Stuck in traffic (why was there traffic in the first place!!! Its supposed to be the best time to be in KL!!), I watched him as i contemplated parking and shooting the old man and his surroundings.

That’s when i notice the stream of foreign labourers walking gloomly into the darkened stairways of the building only for another bunch of them to come out into the hot afternoon sun grinning away. Only once i reached the second doorway did i realise what was going on. I had arrived at pimp street. One moment i was amazed at the number of people streaming into the hideouts and the next i pitied the women who were servicing them in those hot dingy shoplots.

I quickly left the city centre as more people arrived in packed buses and taxis for their holiday in the city. Ah but the hopping bunny had more plans in store for me. In my travels across the state i ended up in Kepong and was quickly enamoured by a row of wooden shop houses by the road. I parked and took out my camera to shoot.

As i was shooting this Indonesian lady sitting outside what seemed like a mah-jong place, out walks this 70 year old spiffily dressed grey haired man to talk to the lady. As i was shooting with my 85 mm i was standing quite a distance and had no idea what they were talking. Just as he was heading back into the mah-jong joint, he spots me and grins at me. As usual i grin back and continue shooting.

Old man returns back with an angpow in one hand and a bag of oranges in another and hands it to the lady. Just as i was about to go (awww so sweet) the old man starts caressing the womans arm right up into the sleeves!!!

Now I can’t help to wonder why the old man grinned at me! Double ewww!!!

Just as I thought that I’ve had enough of the horny old rabbit, i get online and read the funniest link of the era?? 

Good Pakistani Boys Decide Not To Masturbate To Veena Malik

ROTFL I was still laughing when 5 minutes before the first day of the bunny year ended, my friend sends me a link to a hot lungi ad from 1978!

Now we know why the bunny is the mascot for playboy! So hope everyone had a wonderful hopping bunny new year if not a hamsap one! ;p hehhee

Apek – old men
Angpow – money packet given on festive occasions
lungi – sarong
hamsap - horny

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